Seeking Comfort
by actorgirl21
Summary: James gets some bad news. His life will never be the same for as long as he lives and he doesn't know who to turn to for comfort, luckily for him, he doesn't have to decide. It is Febuary of their sixth year.


"Get your lazy arse out of bed! "

James threw the covers over his head as the curtains to his 4-poster were ripped open, as the voice of his annoyed roommate filled his ears.

"Come on James you're already running late."

"Fine" James huffed as he stood up and reached for his clothes, "happy?"

"Come on, let's go down to eat!" Sirius cried "Peter already went down without us."

James threw his clothes on and ruffled up his hair. He had an odd feeling ever since he woke up in the middle of the night, something wasn't right, and James had a bad feeling about it.

On the way down to the Great Hall Sirius was excited, it was Friday and this was a Hogsmead weekend. Hogsmead weekends meant slacking off, drinking butterbeer, and Zonco's joke shop. This time tomorrow, the four would be in Zonco's getting the supplies for the next prank that they would be pulling Sunday morning in the Great Hall.

The boys entered the Great Hall, Lilly looked over and braced herself for Potter's daily morning greeting, but it never came. How peculiar.

"That potions essay yesterday was horrible! I had no idea what I was doing!" Sirius exclaimed

"Maybe if you did the work in class…." Remus started

"I would have no social life!" Sirius finished

James looked at his friends, they were awesome and he wouldn't trade them for anything. He loved the crazy bickering the morning always brought.

"Potions class is useless either way, ole' Sluggy loves us so we don't really have much to worry about." James jumped in.

Remus was about to retort, when McGonagall walked up to the group.

"HE DID IT!" Sirius immediately yelled pointing at Remus, earning himself a glare.

"I am not here to give anybody detention, but as you seem to have a guilty conscience maybe we should talk a little further later." McGonagall said. "Mr. Potter, if you would come with me please?"

James' heart sank, he knew something was wrong and now he was about to find out.

"Woah, woah! If James is getting in trouble for something we were involved!" Sirius exclaimed, curious as to why McGonagall would only be taking James.

"This is not a matter to do with punishment. I suggest you two go off to class. You have Charms in five minuets, do you not?"

Remus and Peter reluctantly walked off, but Sirius stayed behind.

"Is everything okay professor?"

"Go to class now Mr. Black!"

"But-"

"GO!" and with that, Sirius walked off.

James followed his professor, unknowing of where they would be going. His stomach filled with butterflies, and he just hoped with all of his heart that everything would be okay.

Finally they reached the Headmaster's office, James knew for in his past six plus years in Hogwarts, he had been there enough.

"James, please sit down." The old man requested as James entered the room. "We have some… unpleasant news."

"What is it?" James asked as he tried to hide any fear he had in his heart from the two older professors.

"It's about your parents, two of the bravest people that I will ever know. Always very active in the Order…" He trailed off.

James couldn't speak, surely they weren't… no that was silly, they couldn't be. James knew that Voldemort was after his family because of how they were with the order but…

"James" McGonagall started, putting a hand on his shoulder "He found your home."

She needn't say anymore. James knew exactly what she meant when she said that. He had found their house, and took no mercy on the man and woman who did so much to protect the people of the wizard world against him.

He wanted to be able to say something, to see if maybe he had misunderstood, but the eyes of his professors showed him that he was not mistaken. James couldn't breathe. He wanted someone to wake him up, and to tell him he had just been breathing. But this was the real world.

"James, I am so sorry." McGonagall sniffed "They didn't make it."

There it was. Proof that it was over, and then realization swept over him. He had no one to go home to, no one to come into his room to make sure he was okay when he was sick. No one to show him how to use defensive spells to defend himself against the real world. In that moment, he started to cry. James hadn't cried since he was a child, not even over Lily, the girl who would break his heart way too often.

"So, what now?" James asked through the tears that threatened to burst into sobs at any moment.

"Now we want you to stay here. The funeral arrangements are being taken care of, and to insure safety I will attend with you as well." Dumbledore replied

"Today you do not have to attend classes, as a matter of fact that is an order. We will inform you of when you may go back but right now don't stress yourself." McGonagall ordered, "Now go back to your common room, we will let you know when we have things better organized."

James immediately obeyed and walked back to the common room. What was going to happen now? James pondered what his future might bring when the corridors became full again. Of course! It was already time for the Marauder's free period.

Not wanting to be seen by many James briskly walked back to the common room, and gave the password to the fat lady. As he walked into the common room there were barely any people there, only Peter, Remus, Sirius, Lily, and a couple of her friends.

James wasn't sure whether to go up to their dormitory to avoid the girls or to just take the seat that the Marauders had been saving for him.

He plopped down next to Remus and they each gave him questioning looks. Ignoring them, James looked into the fire and was reminded of the past Christmas break. It had been the first Christmas that Sirius spent as a member of the family, and apparently the last as well.

"Mate, what happened?" Sirius inquired. James looked at him in the eye and drew in a shaky breath, he couldn't take it anymore. He looked down and shook his head, fighting the tears that so desperately wanted to fall.

Remus was lost, one of his best mates was next to him so close to breaking down.

"James," he said. "you know we are here for you, you can tell us what's wrong."

James couldn't speak, he threw his glasses on the floor, put his head in his hands and began to sob. He wanted to let them know, and that he knew that they were there. He just couldn't speak. It was so hard. He then heard Sirius and Peter crawl across the floor to sit near him.

Sirius was confused, what on Earth could hurt James this much? Not even Lily had been able to make him this broken. Then he slowly began to wonder... No that was crazy, it couldn't be.

James then said one word, it was barely audible, so quiet that they might not even have heard it.

"Voldemort"

Each boy gained a sinking feeling, as realization came over them. Someone had died. Someone close.

"Who?" Sirius inquired unable to believe his ears.

"Mom and Dad." James breathed looking up at Sirius with bloodshot eyes.

McGonagall then walked into the room and looked at the four. She saw the pain in each boy's eyes. The Potters had been wonderful people, and each of them would be hurt greatly by their loss. As she looked at them a small smile tugged at her lips, if only for a second. Those boys would stop at nothing to help each other. Everyone could tell.

"Sirius may I speak with you privately please? In the mean time I suggest that you two go to your next class, you may spend time with Mr. Potter during lunch."

The boys obeyed and went where they were told, leaving James alone.

In the corner, Lily was still there with a pile of books sprawled across the table, but now she sat alone and her books left forgotten.

James, thinking he was alone, stood up and began to pace.

"Why?" he cried out. "Why them? Why, why, why?" he trailed off and began to cry again, collapsing on a chair directly in Lily's line of sight.

Lily didn't know what to do, but felt she should at least do something. So she stood up and walked across to the seat next to James and put her hand on his shoulder.

James looked up, confusion in his red eyes. Lily took this as her cue to sit down and then in an attempt to console him she brought her arms around him.

In response to this James leaned his weight into her warm embrace. He had no idea what he was doing, or what she was doing, and especially why but he didn't care. He needed it.

As he leaned against her tears fell, for his father and mother he would never see alive again. No more family dinners, no more of his father's crazy random quizzes at the dinner table. No more scolding for pranks when he got home from a holiday. James didn't even know where he would be going after school ended, he didn't have any other family to take him in. His mother was a Black so that side was hopeless, especially after Sirius running away, and his father was an orphaned only child. The next in line would be McGonagall, his Godmother, but would she take him in? Even if it was only for one more summer?

Lily began to rub circles on James' back and he immediately thought of his mother's embrace, and how when he was a young boy she would also rub circles on his back. He would never have that embrace again. Suddenly James clung tightly to Lily and began to sob, he didn't want this embrace to end. What if it was his last?

"James?" Lily said softly "What's wrong?"

It immediately occurred to James that she had been offering him comfort, and it meant so much to him, and she didn't even know what it was for. For all she knew it could have been because he stubbed his toe.

"Umm…" James struggled "I- I uhh… McGonagall called me into her office earlier and, uhh… well, Voldemort…" James broke off again and looked down fighting the new tears that wanted to spill over. He had had enough tears for one day.

"My parents." He finished. It was a lousy explanation but got the point across, and Lily understood. His parent's lives had been taken in the war.

"I'm so sorry," Lily said "is there anything I can do?"

James took a big breath "You already did, thank you. I just can't believe…"

People started walking into the common room to drop off books before going to lunch.

"Here let me help you." Lily said, and preformed a glamour spell on his face so people wouldn't be able to tell he had just been crying, then picked his glasses up off the ground and gave them to him.

"Thank you" James said, unsure of what to say.

"It's okay to ask for help you know." Lily told him before the rest of the Marauders came up from behind him, Sirius looking grim, and Remus swung an arm around James in support.

James nodded at her before walking off with the rest of his friends to lunch.


End file.
